Over the weekend, the same Facebook post kept popping up on my feed.
It was, essentially, a long whine about how poorly Donald Trump has been treated by pretty much everyone since becoming president. And at the end, before sharing it to show support for dear leader, each person signed his or her name and listed their hometowns.
I was not shocked to find that most of the names were from Alabama.
Trump is essentially a poor man’s George Wallace — all of the hate, shadiness and ego, none of the craftiness and intelligence — so of course he plays well among this crowd. He hates non-white people, thinks we should hear the white nationalists’ side of things and made a public display of praying with the Alabama football team. We’re already looking for a stretch of interstate to name after the dope.
But if you’re looking for real world reasons to support the guy, well, that’s where the good people of Alabama lose me.
Trump doesn’t just lie all the time, he’s lied to you, Alabama voter, repeatedly. And not small lies. Big lies.
And YUGE failures.
- “I’m gonna say, ‘Mexico, this is not going to continue, you’re going to pay for that wall,’ and they will pay for the wall.”
— Donald Trump, Aug. 5, 2015
Guess what? Not only has just 20 miles of border wall been approved so far, you won’t believe who’s paying for it. Here’s a hint: It’s not Mexico, and it looks a lot like the person you see in the mirror.
- “We will repeal and replace disastrous Obamacare. You will be able to choose your own doctor again.”
— Donald Trump, July 22, 2016
You’ll be shocked to discover that Obamacare was not repealed. Also, there was no Trump health care plan that covered everyone for much less, as he also promised. The plan he did introduce — so awful that even Congressional Republicans didn’t have the heart to pass it — cost ten times as much and covered 20 million fewer people.
- “We will bring back coal and get clean coal” to “put you (coal workers) back to work.”
— Donald Trump, July 28, 2016
Nope. Since Trump took office, coal jobs have continued to decline. You know, it’s almost as if it’s an outdated energy resource that’s being replaced by less costly, more efficient resources. Because that’s exactly what’s happening. Which is why the last president — you remember, the black guy you thought was the antichrist — tried to give you job training in those new technologies. Instead, you trusted the billionaire who literally thought “clean coal” meant scrubbing the black off. Good call.
- “When I see the crumbling roads and bridges, or the dilapidated airports or the factories moving overseas to Mexico, or to other countries for that matter, I know these problems can all be fixed, but not by Hillary Clinton. Only by me.”
— Donald Trump, June 22, 2016
We’re well over a year into this presidency now and Trump has just dumped out his “plan” for infrastructure — an utterly impossible dream that would be unworkable even if he hadn’t ballooned the annual deficit with his stupid tax cuts for the wealthy.
- “On day one of a Trump administration, the U.S. Treasury Department will designate China a currency manipulator.”
— Donald Trump, Nov. 9, 2015 (Wall Street Journal)
China … still not labeled a currency manipulator on Day 475.
- “We are getting rid of the carried interest loophole.”
— Donald Trump, Aug. 11, 2016
Narrator voice: He did not get rid of the carried interest loophole.
- “I’m so much more into the middle class who have just been absolutely forgotten in our country. Everybody’s getting a tax cut, especially the middle class.”
— Donald Trump, May, 2016
Funny story: the tax plan will actually benefit the middle class the least, with the top 1 percent receiving 84 percent of the cuts by 2024 and 53 percent of Americans actually paying more.
And it doesn’t stop there.
Trump has been engulfed in scandal since his first day, when he started a stupid fight over his inauguration crowd size, and has slowly eroded any decency associated with the office of U.S. president. He’s been caught paying off a porn star, has been accused by multiple women of sexual assault, has spent more on golf vacations in one year than Obama did in three, has run through more White House staff than most presidents do in two terms and he’s employed some of the swampiest of swampy DC insiders.
And none of that even touches on the ongoing Mueller investigation, which has already led to four Trump associates being indicted and the raid of Trump’s lawyer’s office.
It’s an embarrassment that will cheapen the office of president for years to come. But these folks in Alabama — the same ones who wanted to impeach Obama because of this thing that happened in Benghazi that he was probably responsible for, because he was a secret Muslim terrorist sent by George Soros — are signing public declarations of support.
But then, I can only give you the facts. I can’t comprehend them for you.
